Never Argue with a Woman

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, and reads her book. Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, Isn't that obvious?") "You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her. "I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. "I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you, " says the game warden. "That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.
MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

Why West Indian people cannot be terrorists......

These are the top ten reasons why West Indian people cannot be terrorists......

1.) 6:45 am is too damn early fuh we to wake up.

2.)We are always late, we would have missed all 4 flights.

3.) Pretty people on de plane distract we.

4.)We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.

5.) With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget why we were there.

6.) We talk with our hands, therefore we would have to put our weapons down.

7.) We would ALL want to fly de plane.

8.) We would argue and start a fight in de plane.

9.) We can't keep a secret; we would have told everyone a week before doing it.

AND MY FAVORITE

10.) We would have put our country's flag on the windshield.